So, yeah. I'm going to end up alone, except I've tricked "god" by putting an ad for a roommate and there are plenty of folks who want to rent a room for 600 a month. I am not what you'd call "good roommate material." At least I don't think I am. I'm interviewing 3 people tomorrow. I'll gain a human in my life and stop having to work so many hours for shitty pay. Cause let me tell you, Feli getting tired fast.

I'm not even in love with Simon anymore. At least I don't think I am. I don't even know what it is. I think my Dad should have told me he loved me before my suicide attempt. I feel abandoned and yet I bail out before anyone else gets the chance because EVERYONE ALWAYS LEAVES.

Fuck this sounds pathetic, and I don't always feel this way. I just lost Dan, and I feel sad that's all.

On the up side of things, I have an audition for a film (a small speaking part), and she is also looking to cast someone in a pilot show. I'm sure that I'm going to lose sleep for nothing, but I'm going to try. My portfolio on the internet is getting some attention BUT UNFORTUNATELY I've gained 20 pounds since those pictures. I'm still going tomorrow. I'll deny the weight. I'll say that the camera takes 10 pounds off me....